The usual case

Despite my usual case of the Mondays, I did manage to drag myself to the gym this afternoon. I'd make the perfect catholic or jewish father, as it was more guilt than anything that coerced me from my cozy cocoon.

I could hear people getting ready, and my inner voice (aka The Screaming Banshee) was guilting me into going "c'mon lazy ass, you gonna let some guy show you up? you're never gonna loses that last _ 5 pounds before summer, do you even WANT to buffed for the beach, or just look like shamu under the umbrella?" (what, I never said the Banshee was a positive motivator). Finally, the Banshee gave me a good ole' "hooah" leftover from watching full metal jacket over the weekend.

Anyway, while elipticalling (what, if you run, you're running, on a bike you're biking, I was on the elipitcal ergo, elipticalling), I learned something from Charmed (my gym has terrible taste in TV shows, but I gotta say, I've become a secret late fan of the show). Who knew that a Merry-Go-Round has ALL animals on it, whereas a Carousel has only horses? Not me! And to think I've lived my entire life thus far not knowing the difference, and what's more that I learned it from Charmed...

But what I learned is this: old people are more annoying than any other group within a gym. Between all their side chatter, the ups and downs to the crapper, the unwrapping of their sweeties, and their general forgetting to use their indoor voices is really freaking bothersome. AND they're wicked slow getting outta the way when I am leaving (thank god there wasn't a fire) which is never a good thing, especially when I gotta pee because I drank a gallon of coke.

AND because I drank said gallon of coke, I'm also WICKED pisser wired and so NOT tired (and a little bit shaky from the caffeine and sugar overdose) hence my rambling post.

So, now as I write this, I'm watching this show on TLC (which I'm convinced often stands for Totally Lame Content) is about the Arndt family in Milstadt, Illinois (which incidentally, is not far from Pittsburgh) and these folks have 14 - FOURTEEN - kids - 13 boys and only ONE girl.

What is wrong with these people who don't believe in birthcontrol? My mother’s family had 9 kids (and they live right there, too) - must be something in the water... or the koolaid.

Clearly, I need a better hiding place...